created: Sunday, July 20, 2003, 6:08:55 PM

for sure...

You know, i have something here to confess and for sure you'll think twice and wonder if this is true...
but i dont care!!!
what matters... i've told you so,..
now, here it goes...
before you felt something for me,
i've already cried for you,
because i can't understand what i really wanted to happen.
Selfishly, I wanted you to be mine but i dont want you to have me...
as good as...
i wanted to care and love you but i wanted you to just care and not to love me...
i don't know why..
maybe my stupid answer would be...
i don't want somebody as perfect as you...
as manly look as you...
matured enough as you and
handsome as you... AheM!
well, obviously.....
imperfect for me is FINE!
(.'_'.),...
because
absolutely................ im the most IMPERFECT HUMAN..
but.....
STILL
(shy)
iloveyou...
aHhhhhhhhhh!!!
y did i told you so..
its okay...
sometimes..
while we're having some conversations.....
you ask why im like that?
it look's like something different..
but i insist NOTHING!!!..
im always like this, you just didnt notice it before..
but i knew in me...
i cant explain something im feeling..
it was surely strange....
so....
then...
when you say goodbye it's like
u're leaving me..
and im trying to picture it out how would it be if in time we have to bade our GOODBYES...
i ddnt wanted it to happend..
i just wanted to die
and not to exist anymore..




You know,,
there's really a problem that i cant really say to you nor to anyone...
that's why everytime i have to think of you...
i just drowned myself in tears...
and left my body to let my sou getl out of it...

i needed someone who will understand what i have here in my heart..
when i die i wanted my heart to be opened and be studied..
i promise you..
you'll see yourself der..

ei, know wt..
im dreaming and longing for you..
i wanted you.
the problem is i have nothing to prove you...
i have no Gutts to show off
coz ive got nothing to give you...
i have nothing
and youre complete...
everything's different....

pls try to understand..
dont let this hard for me.. u'v been to the point that you've hurted me so much..
and im not even a hard rock that you can throw many times...

you didntknow how hard things to me and im really really dperessed...

ithink these are enogh..
i hated myself
but still
i wanted to turn my back and not to look at you anymore..
you really dont belong to my bloody heart...
but there's onli thing for sure..
you can be seen in my HYPOTHALAMUS any time...
that's a promise that will never be broken...
i hate having promises but mostly i know.. once u did ur into it and you gotta do make it..